MMorris - Media Teacher
The first draft was promising.
I felt there was a nice range of shots in the car park – the editing was a little quick which made the scene confusing. That may have been the point.
Big reliance on captions – you need to include some voice-overs.
The concept of the group being watched was not effectively demonstrated and your next filming scenes need to capture that – perhaps shoot through a keyhole or a crack in the door.
Does the man in the mask have a history with the group or a motivation for revenge?
The piece is on the short side – probably needs 3 more scenes but be careful not to become too linear.
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